Success Brings Consequence

Board Operator: Commander, we have a problem. (Dot flashing and beeping over STL)

Commander BigTyme: What is it?

Board Op: It’s St. Louis sir. They’re………… they’re enjoying life.

Commander BigTyme: What!? They’re supposed to be miserable. They live in the Midwest. They live in St. Louis!  How can this be?

Board Op: It’s the Cardinals sir. They keep winning. They’re one game away from going to the World Series again.

BigTyme: The Cardinals! But they lost Pujols! They…..they were supposed to sink back into mediocrity like all other miserable small and mid market teams. How can this be!? America wants an LA/Boston World Series. Bird and Magic can throw out first pitches!

BoardOp: They overcame losing Pujols with ease sir. In fact it may have actually helped them. It brought them Michael Wacha to go along with all their other draft picks who have developed into major contributors. They have intelligent people in their front office sir.

(Alarm Sounds)

Commander BigTyme (Over Loud Speaker): Attention. Operation Toasted Ravioli Sucks is now live! St. Louis, you’ll pay for this!!!!!!!

End Scene


Boy oh boy has America turned on the Cardinals or what? Coming into this postseason I knew that the public would be heavy in favor of Pittsburgh and I understood. We like a good Rudy story and the Pirates fit that profile but I thought that if the Cards could get by the Pirates that the NLCS would be no worse than split regardless if it was LA or Atlanta. Then the Deadspin article (link) (plus many others since) happened followed by game 3 against the Dodgers and ka-boom! the I hate the Cardinals and their fans festival was in full force. I had this assumption that the Dodgers who’d thrown their financial weight (and it’s fine they have money don’t get pissy) around before the season would have been enough to counter the Cardinals on field success over recent seasons but I was wrong.

Look, if I didn’t live in St. Louis and wasn’t a Cards fan I’d probably hate them as well. If I was a fan of any other team I would be right there on the hate wagon. I’m a very poor sport.  I get it. When a team has too much success they must be brought down one way or another. In a way the Cards are becoming the Yankees, NE Patriots, Miami Heat, Alabama Crimson Tide and Duke Blue Devils to name a few. The biggest difference is all of those teams I just listed have player(s) or coaches you can pin hate to. Arod, Belichick, Brady, Lebron, Saban and Krzyzewski. They’re all successful and good at what they do but for one reason or another people can’t stand them. With the Cards there just isn’t that guy. No one has an out there personality. They’re boring. But you can’t just say I hate a team because they win too much right? There has to be a more “valid” reason……. Ah, the fans. The insufferable BFIB. It’s a weird movement for sure but it continues to pick up steam. If you need more of a rundown as to why people hate the Cards and us as fans here’s another fine piece (link) from Jonathan Mahler who coincidently also contributes to Deadspin. He takes some nice shots at St. Louis as a city. Plus the countless articles written for and against the Cardinals and fans by other writers. By the way, I do enjoy Deadspin and their use of satire so I can’t be hypocritical and rage when it’s about St. Louis. Although I’m not sure I’ve ever seen them pile on to a topic like this before. I’m sure it has something to do with Will Leitch.

We all want David vs. Goliath or Goliath vs. Goliath. The thing with that is only certain teams qualify for the role of Goliath. A large market team with a substantial ( I also realize STL had the 11th highest going into the season) bankroll are two of the main requirements. Everyone else including St. Louis can only be David. And David can only be good for so long. The 2011 season was cool but back to mediocrity you must go. You lost Albert Pujols due to financial short comings and Tony LaRussa so now you must suck until you can gather your resources back to possibly challenge again. That of course didn’t happen and people have had enough. This isn’t how it’s supposed to go.

Nothing’s going to change people’s perception of the Cardinals and their fans now. They want Puig. They want star power and glamour in the World Series not the BFIB and our JELL-O molds. So in closing I’ll leave you with the only thing left for the Cardinals to do (Here). Later you insufferable pretentious cream of mushroom casserole eating weirdos.

Twitter: @DJ_McClure




  • aprfool79 October 18, 2013, 5:04 pm

    Love the video! Maybe my favorite scene from that movie. Now we just need Matheny with a Lou Brown growl 😉

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